Death by Isness?

🫀Death by Isness? 🫀

Dreamtime Archive
3-3-2015

Last night was an epic Adventure.
In summary:
High Lucidity..... Exploring a stone castle type building covered in snow and ice... Running up the outdoor stone steps and leaping walls... Seeing another dwelling near it... I walk over... Strange monkey type astral wildlife... They are in survival mode... Scavenging food and resources... Life is Cold and unkind at that high elevation... They are not concerned with my presence... They run inside the dwelling they have laid claim to.. I follow one in... Round the corner... Dank... Cold...unhospitable....seems deserted for a long time... Then I see a room... Bare mostly... And a woman and several kids... They have been seeking shelter... I wonder to self how they could survive in the harsh elements... And feel great admiration for the strength of will and deep compassion for their hard life. 
I leave... Thinking I will gather some supplies and give to them. 

I'm in a car.... Highly lucid and aware I'm
In Dreamtime..... Thinking of my mission... The woman and kids...and feeling excitement. A very loud shattering Pop. 
Sizzling Tear. Deafening silence, then. In front of me.... Massive white cold coronal mass of light/energy/Isness.... I could almost touch it... Taste it.... It's so penetrating I'm stripped bare... It seems almost like a Sun that has  penetrated right thru many dimensional layers.... Melting thru the fabric of TimeSpace peering sentiently at me…”he who knows himself knows his Lord”.....The excruciating sentience... .... It's so familiar.... I think to self 'wow. Maybe I'm
No longer in the astral plane Playing with worlds... Maybe I've just died... Like totally untethered from the Self I was enjoying being... charleen'...

Sudden I'm Sure that it's true... That I was peering so deep In because I was no longer anchored. 

Moments of sadness pass. I feel " I wasn't finished yet with that life.... I liked it" but I get over it quickly and let it Go... Knowing I've 'died' as Charleen this time... " I guess it's time to finish my
Mission on other planes"....
I leave. 

I am called back to the snowscape mountain fortress with the smaller dwelling.  I just Know there's something there I must find or see or learn. I am outside a large warehouse type building....I KnowFeelIntuit that there is some kind of echo/sonar Entity/device/something.... I go thru the wall. I. See these dolphin like creatures/machines? They seem to be fused.,. Organic/inorganic???is there a difference?
They are floating around in patterns.... Using sonar.... It's  like their movements are Language.... It's eery in there... The energy is palpable.... I feel compressed...
I see down at end of long aisle... A woman... She's running data on crazy computer thing.... I'm next to her... She appears to be my mother... But I know it's a projection... Created from my memoryCardMind in order to make me feel safe... I fuse my energy body with the dolphin thing... And suddenly I Am sensing in Sonar and Echo Waves and it's so fascinating... I can see that the Warehouse is a storage Cell for Moments.... That every thought action feeling was creating simple to complex patterns and that these entities or devices were everywhere decoding with sonar/echo technology every Impulse within the Weave. It was All there. I realized that by fusing with the dolphin thing and sharing it's 'vision' that I was actually recording My Own Patterns as Well as the patterns of its own interference.... I was then fused with the 'mother' entity that was no longer using my
Moms energetic template... But that of a young man, almost boyish... As soon as I see thru his eyes and see the dolphin creature staring right back at me, I begin to disrobe... The dolphin makes contact with its mouth.... I am nearly knocked silly with the vibrational frequency of bliss but at that exact moment I have the thought ' it was a test.. A trap... Now my energy has been drained/absorbed.... ' I feel shame that I was not more discerning... But I let the thought go....and left

Scene shifts. 

I am at a river out in the woods….seems like a sketchy place that only deviants or outsiders go to ….brave people on the fringe….I am walking/hovering around the water. There is a young man catching lobster things/crayfish…I see another person way over at the edge of the water, who seems just to be observing/watching me. There there is a ball field fence to my left and in the field there are people playing ball.  I run up the river and see the crayfish in groups in certain areas and none in other areas. I see a very large one like a lobster under the water too.

I am once again ruminating and thinking about being dead, and feeling a little regretful, like I didn’t finish my ‘work’ on earth as ‘charleen’…I think how lovely the physical fleshly ability to Touch is. I think a long time about this, and about walk-in stuff. 
I think to self "I will really miss the touching of flesh.....  The Love of Humans. It's such a beautiful part of the game'

I think about my family and friends and how much I enjoyed this particular Lifetime Character and Plot. I start to wonder if I really should just incarnate again... But then decide it takes too long... And  will have to pass thru the veil of forgetfulness.. And depending on circumstances...may not ReMember again... who I really Am.... and all my memories and who knows, may not get back to my current state of consciousness next time around….and end up trapped inside the Wheel again. Then I go deeper into the possibility of 'walk ins'…..

Could I take over the body of someone departing who no longer needs it? I could reanimate the Character in a different SElfSuit.... I Figure if I could be a ‘walk-in’ and take over the body of someone who is unable to use it anymore, or who is dying-I could use that persons ‘life’ to re-contact my own SoulGroup/Family and be close physically to them again…and maybe finish my ‘mission’. 

At this thought I find myself in a hospital-like environment…and there is the body of a young black girl, whose spirit is leaving….and who I am debating whether to Merge with/become. But I don’t. It does not feel right. 

I must finish my adventure.......

Scene shifts. 

I am still ‘Dead’ and no one else can see me, except certain people…. I am at a pool with someone who seems to morph from B into R etc. I am hungry and remember food is there…and see a table with sandwiches and people etc.   It is a big pool and lots of people and activity all around. I am unable to eat though, but keep trying. I feel hunger by I cant ‘eat’….AT one point someone tries to feed me a mozzarella ball and I can taste that it is salty, very salty. I can taste the stuff but not swallow or actually eat it? There are some Asian girls giggling at a table with their trays of food, and I take bits from the trays. They don’t seem to mind. D.M is there….he seems to be in the same state as me….and he keeps freaking out and I help him….I calm him etc. It feels like I keep trying to forget that I am not in physical body/’dead’ but keep being reminded. There is a part of the pool that is up on a bank or steep hill, and water comes up to the poles but just stops there….like a fake boundary line. Its weird and fake looking and makes no sense. Several people are bathing up there, and I wonder what they are doing/what makes them special.   I am ready to leave and have my bookbag with me, trying to put food in it…and I have wet clothes…I tell B I will get dressed as we walk home along the long road/path…but realize it will take too long and he has already started walking. I put the bag on the stairs and stuff the clothes in it….slip oisins tiny flip flops on my feet, amazed I can even wear them. D comes around the side and I am like ‘I will help you, man’ and he is laying on the ground and kinda shaking and convulsing, a seizure. I put my hands on him and calm
The Current.  Through all this there is an awareness of something I am ‘forgetting’ or have a ‘vague notion of’…..something ‘I must do’ or ‘gotta hurry’ etc.

I AWAKE. Glad to still have Time left as Charleen. 

I've died hundreds of times in dreams, and in lucid dreams I've died and woken into different lives/selves... So many permutations of it...

But this was different. This felt like.... I was so unfettered in my Astral/light body when face to face with that DimensionDevouringWhiteColdLight that I felt certain I must have been completely freed from my earthly vehicle for good. 

I'm glad I Am still in this particular Game. I like it Here. And it's starting to get even more interesting. Now.