The Crazy you See is the Crazy you Are Fragmented Fallacies Falling apart
Failed the Test, you See, this Weeping World Reflecting the invective Within your heart Hidden from your own Lazy Eye That Wanders yonder to that Other Guy Who plays the Starring Role Of the Splinter in the Pupil of your own Hazy I
Psssst.....
The Masses chose to Sleep In Hit snooze On the Alarm And Roll up the Sleeve and Tighten the Noose As the Needle Enters the Vain Intent to Harm
Psssst.....
There is only One Way Out Of This Charade There is Only One Way Out Of the Bed That 'We' Made
The Body
Demands to be Seen The Only Saviour in this Dream Is your Own Courage To Enter the Seams And reMember you are Infinite UnLimited And CoCreating this Bleeding Scheme
Pssssst.....
The Cartoon has become so outlandish Simply To reflect back to you The Desperate Drama Inside of You
🌹 A Key Once Turned inside a Locked Heart Here In this Space Where the Water fell from the Sky And traced tears on a face That forgot how to cry A Scene That is Now For a Moment Frozen In Time As the Dreaming Dervish Of an Empty Mind Let’s Go And Spins and Begins To Follow The Path Again That Tore the Skin From A Body that Bends And Ties that Bind Souls Within That Try to Hide
There are some Wakings that come like storms Electro-swarms in magnetic forms Dancing On the tips of Hathor’s Horns The Temple Priestess ReBorn WideEyed and Me-oh-my How Time Flies inside the Mind Wandering Womb releasing Blind sides of Ancient crimes Buried within these patient Tombs There are some Wakings that scream like pain Neurolinguistic nails impaled in veins Bleeding And Seeding Stories in silent Shame The Holy Harlot Risen OpenHearted as freedom Parts The Seas of Self and Dwells in the Art Of Body’s Bliss Burning The rotting dross from the Fixed Cross As the Flame is taught to rekindle the Kiss As Magdalenes Grail Returns Opens the Urn Blood flooding in rivers of nerves As the Impaled Heart And Mind Are Healed and Heard…. The Chironic Wound sutured With the Salve of Spoken Words As Pluto and Venus Sharing the Shroud Awake and merge…. Heiros Gamos Blessed and Bound In Sacred Sound Dance In Red Velvet Underground As New Life Stirs.
Numbers are codes and ciphers and archetypal snipers That deliver the sharp tip of the iceberg From the bottomLess See
-41-………5……..Mercury
Quicksilver Shiver of Womb2Tomb2Womb2Tru.th
As the Sulphuric Sun Rises this morn My heart is Born Anew Flow….Let Go….Release the Gold And break the Mold Of ‘previous’ Yous
Day of Birth is Day of Mirth Is Way of Earth for What It’s Worth
InFinite Games of playful Names Claiming their Flames
La Ilaha illallah Solve et Coagula
( gave myself some new ceremonial tattoos two days ago… )
Took Almost 4 hours of meticulous tattooing to do my right wrist ‘Let Go’ ( definitely trickier using the needle with my left hand 😮) ….along with ‘Flow’ on the left arm above the ‘let go’ from a few days ago. I also added 41 dots, as a birthday ritual to honor the 41 years of Living as this Particular me in this Particular Dream . Not too shabby, methinks
I slipped through a crack in the sky Tripped right over my own silly I And plummeted Through the atmosphere Of dancing atomsHere Mapping tears as Phos Fears Wrath and mirrors Refracting Errors As Eros Arrows begin to fly Aimed at Body as Blind Mind tries To hold on Hold out Hold still as Tempest rages about Weightless Images in cages Break the lock And find their way out, in… Eyes of Mages and Pupils And Sages Wake with the shock Of the skin As it begins to peel Away from the clock tocking within The rhythm of Opening And closing Pounding it’s poultice and pouring Its Salve at ions Dreaming As men And women Dressed as Time Spiral path in precious Flesh Dancing thru the Annals of Spine My oh my The journey tries my Patience As I Let Go, satiated by the Doctors Cosmic Order….the Flow Aeons of tight fisted History I now come to Grips With… I hit the Smooth surface Of my Mothers Womb…. Taste the salty brine and prepare To slip through SineWave Lips Soft as sultry hips that shimmy And shimmer as Soul unfolds in bloom A Sacred Intention to Serve This Body of Being As I am Birthed from the Dark Deep See Into the Light of a New Me that Bleeds Stories and Deeds filled with the Perfume Of the Divine embrace Shiva and Shaktis infinite Delight Making Love from the Loom Of Time and Space.
I make my way inside, the tomb and rise again from feelings that flew too close to you,
torn from the womb, tethered hands sworn to illumine weathered lands
and i crash again back into seed
full thrust while blossoms bleed life into the few of the new breed
that makes its way thru density seizing sight, thru intensity of light that makes it all grow
up and away from the roots that know...
breaking tearing swearing making moods that fade too soon foods that make new moon
out of fragments that form too loose sometimes
to hold the rhyme inside, tucked beneath the rising tide of things we share and things we hide
waiting for the revelation to seep up from our pores into our mind tending the sores that stifle the times which await birth here in the name of earth in the name of the mother in the name of the bearing and the burdens of Other ways
to see here, to know here, to feel hear and peel clear of stagnant flesh
saturation
the sudden dawning e v o l u t i o n and i n v o l u t i o n
POISED
between worlds in balance minds of latency bending and twisting
and T U R N I N G back upon itself
remembering the white shroud which once it wore swore to remain unstained but the blackened charred robe of the stars of the wisdom of moments tore thru that fantasy to create a dream so real it s e e m s to feel its own thrust in the darkness of the blinding light beckoning sight into existence.
Resistance repeats cyclic defeats and victorys
mysterys mana urging us on toward the breathing pull of the sun as it rocks a n d cradles its child gently beneath the vestment of LIFE.
I am perched upon a precipice of power Am peering patiently into this passing hour The tocking time that tics up my spine Staff of sovereignty claiming Heart and mind Of the fluid and fluctuating seams I was born Hermes psychopomp between the worlds I straddle horizons between wake and dream Am flowing in glowing neural streams The initiation of Jestation in Times domain Quicksilver deliverer who delves into Pain Flow inTense Knowing inSense Saturation I humbly accept growing adept in Saturns Fixation Am making my Vow to die in Battle, reborn The oath of Thoth, from the womb Torn Messenger who travels thru Linguistic threads Of synaptic rapture as bliss of bodies embed Mind and Time and Space and Rhyme I spin the serpent staffs in waves of Sine Am oozing thru this glowing glue of fluid truth The ether twists of Knowing age and youth Trickster Playing games with pure perception Who pries open I~s asleep to deception Sews and grows the stitches and seams The flowing roads to the richest of dreams Patterns the passions and purpose and pain Into Mattered Moments moving thru Veins Faces and games and containers for rain And mysteries magic sacred and profane Names and numbers for all but the One I am the messenger who delivers the Sun Am the swift footed father of playful Pan The temptation of sensation of magic Man Initiate to mind as it moves thru Ether Who loosens the noose of Io~s tight tether Twists the fists with his serpent staves Matter in patterns of particle and wave Into lifetimes and light rhymes and bold Spaces for grace and beauty to unfold To honor the throne as Jester to the king Play is the way and light is the plaything The maze is a stage for unraveling dazed Neural pathways entwined in minds haze Codes imploding from outmoded games Awakening hearts shaken from shame Within this shared cocreative dance As the quake of the year breaks the trance Lunar reflection, the Mage in the mirror Nodes of infection engage the terror Square and circle , point and line The marriage of heaven and hell in time Spin the wheel and find the center Of Beings great Beauty, now Enter Plural passions are all just passing Roads of fashioned masks of Essence That make you forget your Eternal Flame Begin This Moment and ReMember your name And even the Time of unveiling will Be End and Beginning, infinitely Free In joyful prelude to a new swim in the See Twisting Tendrils of trickster Hermes Synods of souls Alive in the Flesh Again and again our minds enmeshed And I am the psychopomp of pain and play Again I Am, Jester Gestating the New Day.
Charleen Johnston 12-31-20
First word in each line makes a fractal of my rhyme
As I woke in the middle of the night, tangled in hypnagogic bleed-throughs as Previous Me~s in Cyclic read-throughs…. I came back over and over again to myself being Drawn-and-Quartered…. As well as ‘DisMembered’ ….and variations of such….As the crowd looked on. Literally Pulled Apart. I’ve been doing intense Somatic Trauma Work lately ( again) as my inner Blueprint is pushed by the transiting Planetary Gods into Letting Go… Letting Go of the Stories deep within my Cell.ves that keep my body and mind in a State of PulledApartNess. Stuck in the Kinetic Underworld where I’ve locked away Memories so disIntegrating for so many lifetimes and fractal LandMines… that this Entire Incarnations Intention is bound up with Putting MySelfs Back ToGather aGain.
As I tossed and turned unable to fall back into Dream, my mind kept ruminating in my wrists, and the pain, of all my joints and connective tissue, a lifelong issue of Hypermobility and mutation of CollagenCreating which means all my joints sublux constantly, slip in and out, trying to DrawAndQuarter me over and over again til I finally look deeply enough to ConnectTheIssues of these Fascial Tissues and Put mySelfs Back ( literally) together again
My flexibility a gift and a curse… my joints held together by pure force of Muscular Will… which equates to constant muscular tension and alignment issues….when I stop doing the bodywork I need to do, every day, to keep myself Flowing and functional…. I pay. The Deep Trauma Memories stored inSide, are now asking to fully reLease. And bleed throughs of All kinds of Tangled Lives and Times are Arising. Deep, Intense Self Trigger Point work is my Grace…. Going into the pain and buried strains…. Seeking it out, and pressuring with pulsation to Let Go. It’s a religious experience for me, sometimes 5 hours at a time of Trance Trigger Descent, to complete the whole body, entering hallways and mazes of Soul, the Underworld where Fragments of My Being are Held….
All these things passing thru me in the middle of the night, and I realize I need to look at my last nodal cycle transit… 19 years ago… when Ketu last passed over my Sun/Uranus(trauma) conjunction in the first house( body) ….and I suddenly jump up, and go to my journals. So many transits affecting me in this very moment, all Related to a LettingGo of some serious Stuff.
I grab a journal somewhat at random.
It’s the exact time period I was thinking about. Haven’t looked through it in a long time. Opened it up, and the first page Felt like a message I coded to myself years ago, for this very moment of reMembering. Literally. putting my Members back together. Gathering my Appendages and reSeaming myself. To stop the Somatic Pulling apart, the Center Won’t Hold, as long as these memories are buried.
Drawn and Quartered. In front of the Crowd. Among other things. ‘Yet for a time my hands were crippled’ . The panic ( ah, the God Pan when he is not Faced and Fluidly Friended) of my wrists subluxing completely and losing my ability to create.
The following photos are from the Journal, and my Soul insisted on my reading it at that very moment. In Pans Night.
As Ketu moves into the 14th gate….edging over the next little while toward an exact conjunction with my exact sun/Uranus conjunction in Scorpio 1st house… this dream from last year on this date is so prescient…as I am been catapulted into an in depth intense and CATHARtic journey into my own Codings and Woundings, serpentine spine Wound Round by Time as Mind implodes.
Ketu always brings release. If one doesn’t give willingly, it will rip away in whatever way it needs. It’s time. Remembering is just as painful as the DisMembering….more so if the original trauma/s were Blocked or Disassociated from. But to Feel is yo Become Real. Said the velveteen Rabbit.
*the number 14 has been synchronously penetrating into my world over and over and over in the past 6 months. It’s in key 14. 14 is the key.
{Last nights Dreamtime: while handling many rattlesnakes and attempting to remove them From a room in someone else’s house….I analyze the connection to the stargates of the 64 Codons I.e hexagrams I.e squares on the chessboard …. and in particular my own internal relation to the 14th hexagram I.e Gate and the amino acid lysine. I find myself overlayed then in two different Dreamtime spaces at once, as if the intense focus along with the very ‘handling of the serpents’ creates an Opening into the gate itself. I awaken repeating over and over ‘it’s in key 14’