Tag Archives: soul

Structural Integration

One Who Cannot reorganize and reOrient ones own body and release the disfunctional Structural rigidity and misAligned Stored Emotional Tensions that create constriction and prevent Free Flow of Life and Experience, cannot ever ReOrient the larger Body Politik. Inherent Apoptosis , wanders thru the Seams to make wY for Dreams of Integrity…. No? Yes….. To Living…. Is Yes to knowing the Key is Within Your own (S)Cell(F)ular Matrix

as history attests, burning the external representation of the system does nothing except make the scared herd cling ever more tightly to some semblance of being protected and corralled. One must Dismantle the Internal Structure that Bars the Being from ever realizing he never was a Victim to begin with; living an Authentic Life precludes the basic Fact that no outside agency has authority over ones Being, and begins with the tiniest gestures , of which very few people ‘alive’ are willing to Do, because as confining aS it is, most would rather be able to point their finger outside themselves instead of take full responsibility for theirSelf 🌟🃏🌟

….and ‘burning the ruling establishment to the ground in violent revolution ‘ is exactly what ‘they’ want, because in the intermediary chaos and confusion, ‘they’ simply reInstill and reInStall a tighter Reign on the Mind and the Hearts of those who know not how to exist within the Fluidity of ‘No Structure Imposed From Without’…One who has not learned to Organize their own Coherent Existence from Within cannot hope to exist peacefully in a systemless social arrangement any more respectably than one who concedes to the Program in order to remain comfortable.

Don’t they know

My Old art year 2000
Don’t they know? 
They are all just electromagnetic pulses
All just embryos in the body
Of motherMatterMaterMatrix
Placental playscapes practicing for ultimate
Power in the Now
Or Never
Dont they know? 
They all suck from the teat of the Same name
What’s the Formula for this false Game?
What’s the concoction that allows the blame
To be placed outside
Fingers pointed in chiding derision
Forgetting that the Self 
Makes its own decisions
And needs no Other to order decrees
A sovereign Being earns its degrees
On the zodiacal wheel
No permission needed from any 
Pretense of Real 
Power
This is Ours
It’s now and Flowers
Unfold when the hour is too old
To cower any longer behind the soul
Of latency 
The Elect of Life
Electricity
Spermatic emphatic God of pregnancy
Sparks divine creation
In Magnetic womb , magdalenes elation
To carry the sonic boom 
Of natures embodied satiation
Sacred
Sacred …..
Scared with hatred and fake matrix
Manipulation
They all scream
All hide in foggy dreams denying
Their own hand in this plagiarism
The Cluster of Cells where
In-dwells the Hint
Of sacrificial embodiment
Asks only to hold the mirror
Do you know?
Do you know Who you are?
Are you a gob of flesh 
Staring into the abyss of imprisonment
Angry at fragments of your own
Disillusionment?
Fears and tears and shame from years
Of traumatic wounds
And dismemberment?
Are you a pulsing electromagnetic spectacle
Of stardust impregnated into the divine mother
I-And-US
Unfolding embryonic supersonic lust
For Life
Wandering Waves of cosmic Dust
Dancing the dream of Being
As Body
Bleeding with the intense need
To See
The True Seed that grows within
This multidimensional PlayPen
Again and again. 
What’s the Formula for the artificial
Algorithm
That tosses you to and fro
From -ism to -ism
Falling prey to the slayers
Of minds beauty
And truth
And dangling your sovereign self
From the tight noose
Of proof
That red fish blue fish
One fish two fish
Keeps the Me
And the 
You
Twisted 
Into dichotomy
Wishing for ancient sanctions
So patiently
Doctoring reality
To give permission
To step out of this glistening
Wet-dream
Steeped
In sterile
Seeds
Injected into bodies
That no longer
Bleed. 
Free. 
The Self.
And
See.
Differently.

CLJ 6-28-22

We Think In Between The Joints

“We think in between the joints”
Entire universes spread out like Time
As Space hides Selves lost in sockets
And held in rhyme, woven…wrenched
From the mind and hidden in pockets
Within the spine, the hips,
The Shouldered relationships
That bear the burden of Other
Ways, to know here, to feel, hear
And peel clear of stagnant flesh…
Just one. More.Deep. Breath.
Laying prone in a sea of flesh
Held together by pure force of Will
In a dance with past Feels and Reels
That loop and tangle and twist
As The feedback strangles the bliss
Of Letting Go into the abyss
Of the Space between
The floor
and Me
As Self is reCentered in between
The open Doors and open Seams
Of I and Thou
And dancing dreams.
I release…. The tight grip
That has ripped me apart
For 41 years
Held together by pure force of Will
In a shifting atmosphere
Of dizzy atoms here
Playing tricks of light
In a mind held so tight
The body rebels…
Swelling with the trapped rage
In masked pages of the Word
That Stages the painful dichotomy…
Seams so loose
It all spills out of me
Chaotically
I seem to lose autonomy
Christened by the insistence
Of my Fascial Lobotomy incised
By internal programs
That overRide
Who I Am
And climb thru the cavernous
Space
Between the Fleshy Creed
That plays at Being Me….
It Dawns so suddenly
The force of Feeling bleeds
As pounding Heart Seeds frequencies
Illuminating
The maze that traps me….
Dramatic release….
A lifetimes unEase freed
As the iron grip can no longer hold
I leak right out of the mould
And gather
In a puddle of matter
And Mater and Mother
And matrix
Of Self & Other
And Open to the Fugue
As the Swoon subsides….
And There
I Am
Peering In
From Outside the Lines
Where Dark matter
Claims the Mind
And Patterns
The Play
Of Somas Shame
As it falls into the rhythm
Of psyches Game.

Charleen Johnston
5-14-22

Inspired by Sophie’s Strands fb post below

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10228554482073707&set=a.1499832382446&type=3

A visceral reflection of how over muscled and controlled my Soma has been
as a lifetime of the threat of puddling right out of my skin
Has overcompensated
To keep the chaos out( or in?)
Hippos are meant to be soft
And buoyant
As they navigate the waters
Of the emotional realm
But mine has crystallized
And been trained
By the Martian masculine
To grip so tight
There is no room
For darkness
In the light
Of Being.
This I Know
And See
As I Do
Now
What is beginning
To come
Naturally.
Let Go
Into the Flow
Of the See of Me
Sew Seamingly slow
And free.

Some Wakings come like Storms

There are some Wakings that come like storms
Electro-swarms in magnetic forms
Dancing
On the tips of Hathor’s Horns
The Temple Priestess 
ReBorn
WideEyed and Me-oh-my
How Time Flies inside the Mind
Wandering Womb 
releasing
Blind sides of Ancient crimes
Buried within these patient Tombs
There are some Wakings that scream like pain
Neurolinguistic nails impaled in veins
Bleeding
And Seeding Stories in silent Shame
The Holy Harlot
Risen
OpenHearted as freedom Parts
The Seas of Self and Dwells in the Art
Of Body’s Bliss 
Burning
The rotting dross from the Fixed Cross
As the Flame is taught to rekindle the Kiss
As Magdalenes  Grail
Returns 
Opens the Urn
Blood flooding in rivers of nerves
As the Impaled Heart
And Mind
Are Healed and Heard….
The Chironic Wound sutured 
With the Salve of Spoken Words
As Pluto and Venus
 Sharing the Shroud
Awake and merge….
Heiros Gamos
Blessed and Bound
In Sacred Sound 
Dance
In Red Velvet
Underground
As 
New Life 
Stirs. 

11-25-21

Loom of Time & Space

I slipped through a crack in the sky
Tripped right over my own silly I
And plummeted
Through the atmosphere
Of dancing atomsHere 
Mapping tears as Phos Fears
Wrath and mirrors
 Refracting Errors
As Eros Arrows begin to fly 
Aimed at Body as Blind Mind tries
To hold on
Hold out
Hold still as Tempest rages about
Weightless Images in cages
Break the lock
And find their way out, in…
Eyes of Mages and Pupils 
And Sages
Wake with the shock 
Of the skin 
As it begins to peel
Away from the clock tocking within
The rhythm of Opening
And closing
Pounding it’s poultice and pouring
Its Salve at ions Dreaming
As men
And women
Dressed as Time
Spiral path in precious Flesh
Dancing thru the Annals of Spine
My oh my
The journey tries my Patience
As I Let Go, satiated by the Doctors
Cosmic Order….the Flow
Aeons of tight fisted History
I now come to Grips With…
I hit the Smooth surface 
Of my Mothers Womb…. 
Taste the salty brine and prepare
To slip through  
SineWave Lips
Soft as sultry hips that shimmy
And shimmer as Soul unfolds in bloom
A Sacred Intention to Serve This
Body of Being 
As I am Birthed from the Dark Deep See
Into the Light of a New Me 
that Bleeds 
Stories and Deeds filled with the Perfume
Of the Divine embrace
Shiva and Shaktis infinite Delight
Making Love from the Loom
Of Time and Space. 

Charleen Johnston 
10-25-21

The Vestement











The Vestement

I make my way inside, the tomb 
and rise 
again 
from feelings that flew too close 
to you, 

torn from the womb, tethered hands 
sworn to illumine weathered lands 

and i crash again 
back into 
seed 

full thrust while blossoms 
bleed 
life into the few 
of the 
new breed 

that makes its way thru density 
seizing sight, thru intensity 
of light 
that makes it all grow 

up and away from the roots that 
know... 

breaking tearing swearing making 
moods that fade too soon 
foods that make new moon 

out of fragments that form too loose 
sometimes 

to hold the rhyme inside, 
tucked beneath the rising tide 
of things we share 
and things we hide 

waiting for the revelation 
to seep up from our pores 
into our mind 
tending the sores that 
stifle the times which await birth 
here 
in the name of earth 
in the name of the mother 
in the name of the bearing 
and the burdens of Other 
ways 

to see here, to know here, to feel 
hear and peel clear 
of stagnant flesh 

saturation 

the sudden dawning 
e v o l u t i o n 
and 
i n v o l u t i o n 

POISED 

between worlds in balance 
minds of latency 
bending and twisting 

and T 
U 
R 
N 
I 
N 
G 
back 
upon 
itself 

remembering the white shroud which once it wore 
swore to remain unstained 
but the blackened charred robe of the stars 
of the wisdom of moments 
tore thru that fantasy 
to create a dream 
so real 
it s e e m s to feel 
its own thrust 
in the darkness 
of the blinding light 
beckoning sight 
into 
existence. 

Resistance repeats 
cyclic defeats 
and victorys 

mysterys mana urging us on 
toward the breathing pull 
of the sun 
as it 
rocks 
a n d 
cradles 
its child 
gently beneath the vestment 
of LIFE.

Charleen Johnston 2004

	


	





	

		
precipice of power
	


	
	

		











I am perched upon a precipice of power
Am peering patiently  into this passing hour
The tocking time that tics up my spine
Staff of sovereignty claiming Heart and mind
Of the fluid and fluctuating seams I was born
Hermes psychopomp between the worlds
I straddle horizons between wake and dream
Am flowing in glowing neural streams 
The initiation of Jestation in Times domain
Quicksilver deliverer who delves into Pain
Flow inTense Knowing inSense Saturation
I humbly accept growing adept in Saturns Fixation
Am making my Vow to die in Battle, reborn
The oath of Thoth, from the womb Torn
Messenger who travels thru Linguistic threads 
Of synaptic rapture as bliss of bodies embed
Mind and Time and Space and Rhyme
I spin the serpent staffs in waves of Sine 
Am oozing thru this glowing glue of fluid truth
The ether twists of Knowing age and youth 
Trickster Playing games with pure perception 
Who pries open I~s asleep  to deception 
Sews and grows the stitches and seams
The flowing roads to the richest of dreams
Patterns the passions and purpose and pain
Into Mattered Moments moving thru Veins
Faces and games and containers for rain 
And mysteries magic sacred and profane 
Names and numbers for all but the One
I am the messenger who delivers the Sun
Am the swift footed father of playful Pan
The temptation of sensation of magic  Man 
Initiate to mind as it moves thru Ether
Who loosens the noose of Io~s tight tether 
Twists the fists with his serpent staves
Matter in patterns of particle and wave
Into lifetimes and light rhymes and bold
Spaces for grace and beauty to unfold
To honor the throne as Jester to the king
Play is the way and light is the plaything 
The maze is a stage for unraveling dazed
Neural pathways entwined in minds haze
Codes imploding from outmoded games
Awakening hearts shaken from shame 
Within this shared cocreative dance
As the quake of the year breaks the trance
Lunar reflection, the Mage in the mirror
Nodes of infection engage  the terror
Square and circle , point and line
The marriage of heaven and hell in time
Spin the wheel and find the center
Of Beings great Beauty, now Enter
Plural passions are all just passing  
Roads of fashioned masks of Essence
That make you forget your Eternal Flame
Begin This Moment and ReMember your name
And even the Time of unveiling will Be
End and Beginning, infinitely Free
In joyful prelude to a new swim in the See
Twisting Tendrils of trickster Hermes
Synods of souls Alive in the Flesh
Again and again our minds enmeshed 
And I am the psychopomp of pain and play 
Again I Am, Jester Gestating the New Day.

Charleen Johnston 
12-31-20





First word in each line makes a fractal of my rhyme 

MindSight is 2020, Farewell Waker of Beauty






	


	





	

		
The El & the Mag
	


	
	

		

Old Art by me 





🦂At This Very Moment In Time Space … we are on a Precipice…. The fusion of… distorted versions of Organic/Inorganic ways of Being in this Wor(L)d..





…in the Beginning was the Word…





And the word was With God





……………………………………………………………………(El)





And the Word Was God





And the Spell(inG) was Cast





Over the Mass and Crowds in Vast





PrisMs as the EL⚡️Mag Waters Rise Fast





Within the DeoxyRib.E Oh Defrag the hard.drive





And Fasten your Seatbelts





The Dark Man Dwells





In the Space





We





Circle





Time





(&Time Again)





If you can see the Puer and Senex in the Language of these Dreamings





You are walking the road of deCoding the Anguished tangles of the Seaming Seeds





The El and the Mag(dalene)(netic)(ician)(





Dance dance dance





Break the trance





Wake the snake





That shakes and quakes





Within Matter &





CircumStance





CLJ 11-4-21

	


	







	

		
Hypnagogic BleedThroughs
	


	
	

		






As I woke in the middle of the night, tangled in hypnagogic bleed-throughs as Previous Me~s in Cyclic read-throughs…. I came back over and over again to myself being Drawn-and-Quartered…. As well as ‘DisMembered’ ….and variations of such….As the crowd looked on. Literally Pulled Apart. I’ve been doing intense Somatic Trauma Work lately ( again) as my inner Blueprint is pushed by the transiting Planetary Gods into Letting Go… Letting Go of the Stories deep within my Cell.ves that keep my body and mind in a State of PulledApartNess. Stuck in the Kinetic Underworld where I’ve locked away Memories so disIntegrating for so many lifetimes and fractal LandMines… that this Entire Incarnations Intention is bound up with Putting MySelfs Back ToGather aGain.





As I tossed and turned unable to fall back into Dream, my mind kept ruminating in my wrists, and the pain, of all my joints and connective tissue, a lifelong issue of Hypermobility and mutation of CollagenCreating which means all my joints sublux constantly, slip in and out, trying to DrawAndQuarter me over and over again til I finally look deeply enough to ConnectTheIssues of these Fascial Tissues and Put mySelfs Back ( literally) together again





My flexibility a gift and a curse… my joints held together by pure force of Muscular Will… which equates to constant muscular tension and alignment issues….when I stop doing the bodywork I need to do, every day, to keep myself Flowing and functional…. I pay. The Deep Trauma Memories stored inSide, are now asking to fully reLease.
And bleed throughs of All kinds of Tangled Lives and Times are Arising.
Deep, Intense Self Trigger Point work is my Grace…. Going into the pain and buried strains…. Seeking it out, and pressuring with pulsation to Let Go. It’s a religious experience for me, sometimes 5 hours at a time of Trance Trigger Descent, to complete the whole body, entering hallways and mazes of Soul, the Underworld where Fragments of My Being are Held….





All these things passing thru me in the middle of the night, and I realize I need to look at my last nodal cycle transit… 19 years ago… when Ketu last passed over my Sun/Uranus(trauma) conjunction in the first house( body) ….and I suddenly jump up, and go to my journals. So many transits affecting me in this very moment, all
Related to a LettingGo of some serious Stuff.





I grab a journal somewhat at random.





It’s the exact time period I was thinking about. Haven’t looked through it in a long time. Opened it up, and the first page Felt like a message I coded to myself years ago, for this very moment of reMembering. Literally. putting my Members back together. Gathering my Appendages and reSeaming myself. To stop the Somatic Pulling apart, the Center Won’t Hold, as long as these memories are buried.





Drawn and Quartered. In front of the Crowd. Among other things. ‘Yet for a time my hands were crippled’ .
The panic ( ah, the God Pan when he is not Faced and Fluidly Friended) of my wrists subluxing completely and losing my ability to create.





The following photos are from the Journal, and my Soul insisted on my reading it at that very moment.
In Pans Night.





CLJ 1-9-22
































































Journal entries in blood red ink